Philomen and I
We arrive in a cloud of smoke as we climb off the motorbike. Noisim and I walk the last 500 metres to the family compound. It is all up hill. She explains that this is the land of her father –in–law, who is dead. He had three wives and each of them live in their own manyatta. The rule in polygamy within the Maasai community is that you must provide a separate house for each wife. The first wife had 7 sons (one of whom is Noisim’s husband), the second wife had 2 sons and the third wife had 3 sons. All of their offspring live on the family land with their wives and children. Some live in manyattas – other have more substantial homes made from corrugated iron.
Noisim with her other two mother-in-laws
We visit her first mother-in law who is inside her manyatta. It is an extraordinary building made of sticks, mud and cow dung. It is very dark inside and consists of a cooking/sitting area and two sleeping areas – one for the parents and one for the children. As my eyes adjust to both the darkness and the smoke from the cooking fire, I can see that it is very efficiently laid out – everything has its place. I am warmly welcomed and invited to sit down. We exchange pleasantries and Noisim translates. After a while, we leave to visit the other wives’ manyattas too. I am offered tea and lunch wherever we go but luckily Noisim explains we are going to the party and have no time to eat or drink.
Leah, one of Noisim’s mother-in-laws in her manyatta
I meet cousins, and nieces and in-laws as we make our way around the compound. A hoard of children trail behind us. I hold the latest addition to the clan; 3 month old, Philomen. I take lots and lots of photos. There are copious numbers of goats and their kids. It is reminiscent of Uganda. I can’t resist the opportunity to get my photo taken with one.
We go to Noisim’s house which is made of iron sheets. It has a spacious living room with cooking area, a bedroom and a washroom /toilet. The tradition is to add rooms as you make children! She has one son, Max, who is two years old. Her husband works in Nairobi and manages home only once per month. In the holidays, she stays with him in the city. They met when they both worked for Unilever. He now works at the airport and she is a teacher. They courted for 3 years and had Max before marrying last year.
They are modern. There will be no second wives in this family. They are planning their family and want another baby in 2020 when Noisim will have finished her studies. There will only be two children. However, they must keep their plans secret as such a small family would be disapproved of. Noisim explains that things are changing rapidly. In her parent’s generation, it was all arranged marriages. There was much polygamy with young girls being given to old men as fourth and fifth wives – for the price of a donkey! It is not like that now. The majority of young people are choosing their own partners. Not all of the older generation approve.
Muzungu Maasai
When it is time to go, Noisim presents me with a Maasai beaded necklace which she has made herself. Now I am the Musungu Maasai. she informs me. I quite like the nickname.
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